February 2007

This month was the first month without the other doctor on staff, and it was freeing to have it over, even if it was lots of extra work. I keep wondering why I didn’t take action sooner and what action I could have taken. One of the original consultants I spoke to in M3 told me that the problem of abdication is pervasive in management. That is, it is common for an executive to give a job to someone and then not check it carefully – make milestones, benchmarks, specific tasks in space and time; then have a reward or punishment when appropriate. I gave him the job of Lead Doctor and then let it go. I knew he wasn’t doing it well or right, but all I did was discuss it with him. I didn’t reset a goal or make a new milestone. (I did revisit benchmarks, but didn’t put any oomph behind it with requirements.) When we met it seemed like we were having a friendly discussion rather than one about Business. What was I thinking?

Now I am the Lead Doctor. It’s a role I know well and do without any problem. In fact, it’s easy. In any case, it’s simple. Owning a business is anything but simple, and though I revel in the activity, sometimes it’s exhausting. I am not naturally savvy as a businesswoman. In some ways it makes me think that I should just go back to a small private practice set-up. So often I wonder if I am just too big for my britches thinking that I can grow this company as a businesswoman. On the other hand, one conversation with someone about the poor quality of human health management reminds me of why this company is so necessary and why I love doing it. I am sure that I hate management of daily or incidental things. I love leadership activities like teaching, passing along the vision, reviewing numbers and planning ahead. If I can get the right manager I think I will be in heaven.

In the meantime, the new doctor starts in a few weeks. I am gearing up for that!